Lies .

Okayyy ..

so i told him I loved him back .

becauuuuuse, i really felt like I did .

I've never really loved someone before

and I didnt really know what to experience

cus this is all branddd new . but it felt like

love because ... idk . he feels different . we've

been on and off and like ...

well, ima just put it to you simple .

sometimes i feel like hes bullshitting me . I mean,

I knowww hes flirtateous, cus he looves females .

and i know hes got some on his dick . but im not gonna

trip over that cus, how IMA be mad cus girls like HIM,

but then againnn .. he prolly likes them back too .

i dont know . he says he loves me . but how IIIIII see it,

is that he only loves me, because I make him feel good .

you know how I know ? because we dont have a level of

understanding . we dont talk about shit . unless IMMM

the one asking questions . he doesnt ask me anything .

not that im asking for him to interrogate me, but i mean,

get to know me ! shit . and I feel like, if I ask him a question,

he be gettin all annoyed . i mean, i DOOO ask like a million

but only cus he FORCES me to ! if he engaged in a conversation

with me, then i wouldnt be asking a million . I mean, we DOO talk,

but ... I want to get to know him on a DEEPER level, than just a

simple how-was-your-day type shit . I want to get inside his head,

know how he feels about certain things, etc etc .

idkk . we're not on the same page . not on the same level of

understanding . but i want us to be . in the beggining, he told me

he wanted me to be his girlfriend, his bestfriend, his wifey, his everything ...

i mean, i dont think he was bullshttin me, but .. then again, stick to your word .

if you want me to be all that then act like it . its just frusstrating .

i think he thinks that we dont have problems .

well ... we do . well i do .

is this why i'm so unhappy ?

because he doesnt love me,